The Battle of the Sexes

Still waiting on our approval letters from USCIS. It's the only thing we need at this point. If you have a minute, a prayer that we get both of them soon would be much appreciated.

One of the blogs I read is Blue Eyed Bride. She has two little boys, and I find her very relatable. Anyway, the other day she tweeted about this article, and said all mothers of little boys should read it. So I read it.

The article was about how it seems like boys have relegated to second place in the United States. In the author's words boys are the "consolation" prize. Anyway, it really got me thinking. I don't know how many times I've heard (quite a few different) mothers say, "Oh, I'm glad I have a girl (or girls) instead of a boy!". Or, "I don't know how you do it. Boys are so much work!". I realize that most people don't mean any harm by them, but these kinds of statements can be just as offensive as saying that girls are "prissy, dramatic, and manipulative". By the way, I don't think that girls are "prissy, dramatic, and manipulative". I'm just making a point.

I also hate the stereotypical "boys are better at math and science while girls are better at reading and writing" school of thinking. The truth is, boys are slightly more immature than girls. There brains do develop differently. But these kinds of thoughts are very damaging to children. Please don't ever say, "well you're a boy so you won't be good at reading" or "you're a girl so math won't be your thing". I've seen these ideas put a stumbling block in the way of the success of a child time and time again.

Okay, sorry about the educational bunny trail. Back to the point.

We have chosen to adopt a little girl. The truth is, I had a very hard time coming to this decision. Not because I wanted a little boy more. Not because I wanted a little girl more. Mainly because more than anything, I just wanted a child. I felt very odd making this choice that is usually left up to God. But at the same time, I had to admit that I've always wanted a boy and then a girl (in that order). Don't get me wrong, I would happily take a houseful of wrestling boys, or a houseful of girls playing dress up. But being faced with the choice, I realized that I wanted both. I wanted the balance of having a boy and a girl. I wanted my precious son to have a little sister to protect and love. I wanted my little girl to have a big brother to look up to and adore. So after much prayer and discussion, we requested a girl.

In the end, I don't think it's about having a boy or girl. I think it's more about never looking on either sex as being the "wrong" sex or the "right" sex. In some countries, having a girl brings a stigma and inconvenience which leads to little girls being abandoned by the thousands. In other, more developed countries, people look at little girls as the prize to be spoiled, pampered, and doted on while boys are considered loud, annoying, and pesky. Personally, I think just being able to nurture, love, and have the enormous responsibility of taking care of another human being is the greatest prize of all.