Qualified

As a mother I often feel so underqualified. I'm sure I'm not alone in this. I sometimes wonder if I'm crazy. Am I really qualified to be the mother of two children one of whom may come with some pretty hefty baggage even at a very young age? Am I really qualified to mother a little girl? I mean that's a job. And honestly, I think that mothering a daughter is much more difficult than mothering a son. They both have there challenges, but as a woman you have to be so careful not to push your own issues and insecurities on your daughter.

There are no college courses for motherhood. There are advice books, there are parenting books, but in the end they are really only some man or woman's opinion about how to parent. And the truth is I think that the devil wants nothing more than to make women feel underqualified. He wants nothing more than to make us feel like we just aren't good enough.

And that ladies, is where the real manual comes in. God's Word. I've been really focused on Proverbs 31 lately:

The Virtuous Wife (Proverbs 31:10-31 NKJV)

    ¹⁰ Who can find a virtuous wife?

      For her worth is far above rubies.

       ¹¹ The heart of her husband safely trusts her;

      So he will have no lack of gain.

       ¹² She does him good and not evil

      All the days of her life.

       ¹³ She seeks wool and flax,

      And willingly works with her hands.

       ¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,

      She brings her food from afar.

       ¹⁵ She also rises while it is yet night,

      And provides food for her household,

      And a portion for her maidservants.

       ¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;

      From her profits she plants a vineyard.

       ¹⁷ She girds herself with strength,

      And strengthens her arms.

       ¹⁸ She perceives that her merchandise is good,

      And her lamp does not go out by night.

       ¹⁹ She stretches out her hands to the distaff,

      And her hand holds the spindle.

       ²⁰ She extends her hand to the poor,

      Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.

       ²¹ She is not afraid of snow for her household,

      For all her household is clothed with scarlet.

       ²² She makes tapestry for herself;

      Her clothing is fine linen and purple.

       ²³ Her husband is known in the gates,

      When he sits among the elders of the land.

       ²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,

      And supplies sashes for the merchants.

       ²⁵ Strength and honor are her clothing;

      She shall rejoice in time to come.

       ²⁶ She opens her mouth with wisdom,

      And on her tongue is the law of kindness.

       ²⁷ She watches over the ways of her household,

      And does not eat the bread of idleness.

       ²⁸ Her children rise up and call her blessed;

      Her husband also, and he praises her:

       ²⁹ “ Many daughters have done well,

      But you excel them all.”

       ³⁰ Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,

      But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised.

       ³¹ Give her of the fruit of her hands,

      And let her own works praise her in the gates.

When I first began studying this I'll be real honest, my initial thought was, "Seriously! This woman apparently doesn't sleep. She never whines. She's always working. She's the picture of perfection. No woman can live up to this." And y'all in our, "Me, me, me . . . I need time for myself society" this just doesn't fit in.

But before you have a full on fit (much like myself), I want you to read vs. 30. "Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the LORD, she shall be praised." There's the key. Fear of the Lord. If you go back to vs. 10, according to Strong's Concordance the word "virtuous" comes from the Hebrew word "chayil" and it means:

1) strength, might, efficiency, wealth, army

    a) strength

    b) ability, efficiency

    c) wealth

    d) force, army

It is the same word that was used to refer to the thirty thousand "mighty men of valour" in Joshua 8:3.

Y'all this isn't some wimpy timid woman. She's an amazing woman. She has strength, ability, efficiency . . . Which brings us full circle to vs. 30. In order to be any of these things we have to "fear the Lord". Fear of the Lord brings with it an ability to function in this world to our fullest potential. The word fear comes from the Hebrew word "yare'" which means:

1) fearing, reverent, afraid

That's what this whole "Virtuous Woman" thing is about. It's not about being perfect or qualified. It's not about running around like a mad woman trying to perform to please others. It's about holding God in the highest regard. It's literally about putting Him before everyone and everything else . . . our husbands, our kids, ourselves.

I'm still a huge work in progress. I think I fail at this on a daily basis. But it brings me so much relief to know that I don't have to be "qualified". That the more I seek God, the more He changes me. And the more He changes me the more "qualified" I become. Not because of anything I do or can do, but because of who He is in me.