Anyone Want to Join the Insanity?

So a while back (like a couple of weeks . . .  I think), I said something along the lines of how I wanted to live a less performance based lifestyle and to allow God's grace and mercy to be what leads me in life. That make any sense? Anybody even know what the heck I'm talking about?

If you aren't a performance driven person then you probably don't get this. And I'm not referring to being a lazy Christian just in case that's what you're thinking. I'm referring to not thinking that you can do anything to earn God's favor. This isn't the Girl Scouts people. This is Christianity. It seems like in the church it sometimes becomes about who can do more. As if we are earning merit badges. And y'all I'm one of the worst. All my life I've been a goal oriented person. I'm a perfectionist. I'm a worrier. I think things have to be done a certain way (dare I say I may be slightly OCD). Don't laugh many of you are right there with me.

So along with this new resolution of sorts comes the fact that I have to learn to totally and completely trust God. I have to learn to listen and hear and trust Him to lead me. It sounds so simple, yet it is so difficult. I find myself wondering and worrying that I haven't done something to please Him or that I am doing something that displeases Him (OCD anyone?). Not to mention that I just worry about everything in general. Seriously unhealthy? I know. Completely unreasonable? I'm not under any misconceptions about how stupid continual worrying is. But y'all . . . It! Is! An! Uphill! Battle! I've done it (it being worried) for 90% of my life.

Okay, so here's the question. How many of you girls (and guys) struggle with the same issues? How many of you want to join me in this crazy journey of becoming more dependent on God and much, much, much (I could add much many more times, but I won't) less dependent on self? If you want to, comment or email, and we'll commit to support one another and pray for each other. If not, we'll then chalk this up to another one of the crazy lady's posts. :)