Most Days It's More Than Okay

Thank y'all for the kind comments on the last blog post. Most days I'm okay. We're busy, and Andrew keeps us on our toes. And so time passes quickly. But there are days. Days when it makes me sad. Days when it makes me angry. Days when it makes me insanely frustrated.

I'm sad and angry and frustrated for Andrew. He wants a sister. And while I know that there are going to be sibling conflicts, I also know that Andrew will be an awesome big brother.

I'm sad and angry and frustrated because my daughter is sitting somewhere in an orphanage. And no matter how awesome that orphanage may or may not be, no matter how wonderful the caregivers are, it's still an orphanage. No child deserves to spend her days in an orphanage. Each child deserves a loving family. While that's far from reality, it doesn't change the fact that it is still truth.

But like I said most days, I'm more than okay. Still we covet and appreciate your prayers. I often say that all we can do is pray. But honestly if that's all we can do, then we have already done more than we could ever imagine.

On Waiting, and Home Study Updates, and Questions

I'm just going to go ahead and apologize ahead of time for the tone of this blog post. It's just kind of yucky, but it's honest, and I need to say it so yeah . . . sorry.

When we started this whole adoption process our adoption agency said that the wait for a referral was somewhere around 18-30 months. Well, 18 months has long since passed, and in just over half a year we'll hit that 30 month mark. And now the wait time being given to prospective adoptive parents is 30-48 months. Ugh . . . that's all I have to say about that (well I could say more, but will stick with ugh). And we're not sure exactly where that leaves us in this whole crazy process. So that's swell.

I don't blame anyone. I don't feel like our adoption agency was or is trying to mislead us. I don't think Bulgaria is trying to hold back children. I really think everyone involved is doing everything they can to get these kids into homes, but a lot has happened since we started. There have been glitches in the system and political delays that cannot be helped. It's pretty par for the course in international adoption. But the waiting and the constant merry go round of home study updates and fingerprints and letters and appointments gets old fast. And after 24 months, I know that we have no choice but to turn to God to give us the strength and stamina to "keep on keepin' on".

It does look like we have finally finished this year's home study update. Between the FBI fingerprint fiasco and the move, this home study update has been a royal pain. But we're finally through. Now we have to wait for the official copy so that we can apply for our biometrics (fancy word for fingerprinting) update with USCIS. For the love of all that's good and holy I don't know why these government agencies can't communicate with one another! If only I was in charge . . .

And if one more person asks, "Did you realize it was going to be this long???" . . . Seriously, don't ask that. Reword it, ask something else. Ask how it's going. Ask if we've heard anything. But geeze, don't ask if we knew it was going to be this long.

I told you this would be all sunshine and rainbows. You were warned. I know that there will come a time when this will all be behind us, and we will look back and think, "oh it wasn't so bad." But in the midst of it all, I have my moments. And well, my moments sometimes spill over onto my blog. There's a reason I apologized in advance.

Update and the Best Ice Cream in the Country

On Monday evening I went to check the mail, and there was, finally, a letter sized envelope from the FBI. Letter sized envelopes are good. Big yellow envelopes mean they're sending new fingerprint cards. Yay for finally receiving my approval.

Yesterday, we overnighted both of the approvals to our home study agency. I'm super glad to have those out of my hands and in the hands of the h.s. agency. I talked to yet another social worker today. She's coming on Saturday to finish out our third home study update. While I'm not crazy about having four social workers in just over two years . . . insanity . . . they've all been really good. Please join us in praying that everything goes just as smoothly with this one.

The other day I was talking to someone who was astounded that a couple, who could actually give birth to children without any complications, was thinking about adopting. This made me want to beat my head against the wall. I know that for some couples adoption is chosen because they cannot conceive or because pregnancy is too high of a risk. For us, we made the choice not to have anymore ourselves because another pregnancy would be high risk. But honestly, adoption has always been on the radar, and adoption wasn't a fallback or a plan B. It was and is the plan God has for us, and I kind of resent it when people think of adoption as only for those who can't have kids the "normal" way. Just to be clear adoption is part of our Plan A just like having Andrew was part of our plan A. And I'm pretty sure that we would've adopted with or without the high risk pregnancy issue.

I know. I'm on a roll. I think I'm antsy because we're reaching the two year mark for being registered in Bulgaria. I am praying that we're on the downhill side (or at least the top of the hill) of things. But things haven't been moving incredibly fast in Bulgaria . . .  so we wait. It's all we can do.

Time to change the subject . . .

Monday morning Sarah and I loaded up the boys (Brendon is here for a couple of weeks) and headed to Brenham to the Blue Bell Factory. How have I lived in Texas all my life and never been to the Blue Bell Factory? It was so much fun, and it ended with a nice large scoop of ice cream. What more could you ask for?

A little Instagram action going on in this one.

My sister would make a fabulous Blue Bell girl. Don't you think?

Career change? The only problem is you can eat as much ice cream as you want if you work for Blue Bell. While some people say they would tire of ice cream, I know for a fact I wouldn't. Ever. I have to fight the urge to eat ice cream on a daily basis as it is.

Ending with a scoop of ice cream because everyone knows Blue Bell really is "the best ice cream in the country".

Beach Trip 2013

This summer is flying by, and it's hard to believe that in just over a month, Andrew will be starting kindergarten. When did he become old enough for kindergarten?!?

Between moving and unpacking and getting settled, we knew that there was no way we'd be able to take a big vacation this summer. But we were able to get away to the beach for a few nights, and although it rained quite a bit while we were there, we were still able to rest and relax. And I'm pretty sure Andrew would've stayed forever if he could have.

Day 1 - Beautiful views, lots of turtles, and fun in the water! Great start to our time at the beach. 

Day 2 - You can't tell by these pictures, but it was raining quite a bit. However, it wasn't storming so we put up our canopy, and played in the rain.

 Day 3 - After early morning storms, the sun came out, and the day was absolutely beautiful. It wasn't too hot, it wasn't too cool, it wasn't too windy or too calm. It was just about perfect.  

 Unfortunately, all good things, including beach trips, must come to an end. And it was time to head back to reality and finish hanging pictures on the walls at home.

Too Many House Photos

I was going to wait until we had everything done and up in the house to post any photos. But that may end up being 100 years from now so I decided to go ahead and fulfill everyone's voyeuristic tendencies and post away. Or is it just me that likes to spy on other people?

Quick story: This was not the house we set out to build about a year ago. Originally, we were going to build a two story house that was slightly bigger, and a somewhat different style than this one. But when we started looking at cost, we realized that it just wasn't practical. So we talked to the guy that used to be in charge of building the houses out here. The company that used to build out here pulled out a couple years ago, and now he builds and sells houses on his own. Because he knows us and has worked with Patrick on real estate deals, he agreed to help us find a plan and build it for us. We actually started with a plan that was originally offered out here, and then we had the architect change it and customize it to fit us and our needs. As a result we ended up with a custom house that was right on budget (yay!) and also fits well in the neighborhood. Anyway, the other day, whilst unpacking, I started looking at the plans from the original house we were going to build, and I realized that it had a lot of wasted space that we wouldn't have used (thus making it bigger but not necessarily more use-able) and the kitchen was tiny compared to what we have now. I'm very thankful we built the house we did.

If you want a better understanding of the layout you may click here. It'll give you a play by play of the layout. Otherwise, you'll just have to be content with disjointed pictures.

Starting with the outside. We have grass but no trees yet. We're probably going to wait until it cools down just a tad before we plant any trees.

And now moving on to the inside . . . 

The entryway . . . sorry about the weird glare. I was having light issues. To the right is the dining room.

Two views of the dining room. Please ignore the bare walls. 

The kitchen as seen from the entry. You'll notice we only have two bar stools. Why Hobby Lobby can't keep a larger stock is a puzzle to me. Now we're on a mission to find a third one that matches somewhere in Texas. 

Kitchen as seen from the living room. The open-ness is one of the things I love about this house.

The living room. The little boy with the blue shorts came with the house. ;)

Kitchen . . . as if you'd look at this and think, "Ohhh! This must be the master bath". 

The Butler's Pantry which connects the kitchen and dining room.

The (big) laundry room which will never in a million years be this clean again. So take a good look and stamp it in your brain forever.

This is Allison's future room. We left it as undecorated as possible because hopefully we'll be decorating for a little girl in the very near future. Also, notice all the pictures and paintings that have yet to be hung piled on the bed. 

Kids' bathroom. I stuck with the Dr. Seuss "One Fish, Two Fish" theme from the previous house.

Andrew's superhero room and his new "bump" beds.

Once upon a time there was a couple who lived in a four bed, two bathroom house. They used one of those rooms as an office/exercise room, but then a little baby boy came bouncing into their lives, and they (and by "they" I mean "me") with visions of Pottery Barn play spaces dancing in their (and by "their" I mean "my") heads decided to turn said office/exercise room into a playroom for their bouncing baby boy. Mistake of the century! Do you know how many more toys you collect when your child has two rooms instead of one? And for the record he almost never played in this amazing playroom. Do you know what it's like to cram all of your office stuff into your closet (weird!) and your exercise stuff into your bedroom? You cannot find anything! Ever! Anyway, we reclaimed our office/exercise space, went through Andrew's toys and gave a bunch away, and crammed all his other stuff in his bedroom. And he loves it, and we actually have a place for all our books and files and paperwork. And the angels sang hallelujah!

The master bedroom with it's balance of feminine and neutral. Because my husband doesn't do "girly" very well. 

And finally the master bathroom. You'll notice the his and hers mirrors and vanity spaces. While the separate spaces are wonderful, the different mirrors weren't some sort of genius decorating idea. They were simply because we couldn't find two different size mirrors that were the same. So we decided to go two completely different routes . . . masculine and feminine. And I really like the overall effect.

And that's all she wrote folks. I plan on doing a post where I discuss paint choices, the floor, cabinets, etc. But we'll save that for another day.

Ten Years

Ten years ago we walked down the aisle and said "I do". Although, I'm pretty sure we had absolutely no clue what we were saying "I do" to. 

Three houses, one psychotic cat, two badly behaved dogs, one kid (almost two), and many adventures later we're on the other side of a decade of wedded bliss. 

Has it always been perfect? No. Has every moment been full of joy and contentment? Let's be real . . . not even close. But has it been fun? Absolutely! Has it been worth it? Most definitely! And I . . . I would venture to say we . . . wouldn't trade it for all the gold in King Solomon's mines. 

I received these beautiful roses for our anniversary. 

When opening the door for the roses the two badly behaved dogs darted out and proceeded to run away. So yep, I was the crazy lady, chasing my dogs down the street in my robe and pajamas while my son followed me crying because on top of everything else, guess who wasn't dressed yet? Just a day in the life . . . 

Happy Anniversary Honey!

Busy Days

Good morning all! I promise to do a house update really soon. We're still finishing up a few things around here.

Right now I'm working on our second home study update in less than three months. The update itself should be really easy, and we're only doing it because we moved. The main focus is safety and fire prevention. Knowing that we would have to pass a home study, I unpacked accordingly. The problem is we're still waiting on my FBI fingerprint approval. Our adoption agency will not approve the home study without it. I'm getting antsy because we're getting awfully close to time to file for our NBC extension. Without our home study we can't file for our NBC extension, and Bulgaria does not like expired NBC approval (there is a possibility of being removed from the waiting list). So yeah, I'm antsy and trying not to stress too much. Any and all prayers will be much appreciated.

Yesterday, we went with my sister's family to Schlitterbahn. They have season passes and go all the time, but this is the first time Patrick and I have been since before we were married. Of course, Andrew's never been. He had a blast and was completely wiped out last night. I only got a few iPhone pics at the end of the day when he was playing in the pool because water and cameras generally don't mix well. But Andrew did his share of rides and was shockingly unafraid, and since it was cool (for July) and cloudy I think that helped keep the crowds at bay. Either way it was a lot of fun.

Now I'm off to finish my home study paperwork and try not to freak out anymore than absolutely necessary. :)